The 20 Dumbest Things Said By Non-Petrolheads, As Heard By CT Readers
1. You keep using the term 'JDM', I don't think you know what it means... - SkylineBoy
My classmate: “JDM cars suck, I’d rather have a Japanese car.”
2. Of course I put oil in it - FinnishCapriFan2904
A friend of mine who is a mechanic told me this story: lady comes into his shop and asks him if he can check her car because it started making weird noises and didn’t run. She tells him she just put some oil in it. He checks the oil and asks her: what kind of oil did you put in it? She responds: just some olive oil!
3. Rotary confusion - Ryan Kennedy
I went to a car show. Me: “Oh how nice is that RX-7 Bathurst R over there?” Friend: “Why? What’s so good about it? It’s only a four-cylinder.” We aren’t friends any more.
4. What is that stick for? - Gabz
My first girlfriend asked me what the shifter was and why I was “fiddling” with it all the time.
5. Car spotting lvl: expert - Zac Campbell
“Wow dude, look at that Lambo!” It was a Mitsubishi Eclipse.
6. So that's what it's for! - Caleb
My friend who has been driving for two years only recently found out cars run on petrol. All this time he thought a car’s power came from the battery and the crap he was putting in at the gas station was just an essential lubricant for the car.
7. How does VTEC kick in? - Eduardo Silva
“Where’s the button for the turbo?!” “Where do you turn VTEC on?!” Those actually happened, I remember laughing so hard.
8. At least they tried - Stephen Blaze
“Is that the new Toyota EVO??” - while looking at a Nissan GT-R.
9. The knowledge is strong with this one - Daym u str8 babygurl
”Every car in the world has four spark plugs”
10. More rotary confusion - Gregory Griffo Griffiths
I had one from a car guy! We had just watched Tokyo Drift at the cinema and at the end he came out with “Man I’d love that RX-7! Would be amazing with a set of forged pistons!” It took me a couple minutes to actually get my words out…
11. Cylinders? You mad bro?? - Rahul Dias
My friend almost killed me when I told her that her car had four cylinders. She said “This is not one of those lame f—king CNG cars, it runs on gasoline. Why would there be cylinders in a gasoline car?”
12. Hubcaps: you're doing it wrong - Trevor Campbell
A good friend of mine (who is now a corporate lawyer) looked at my Volvo hubcaps and told me I’d installed them upside down.
13. Exhausting levels of ignorance - Dylan John Benjamin
“Only V8s have dual exhaust tips”
14. Wrong supercar - That ford guy
My friend once said “Look at that Ferrari.” It was an NSX.
15. Tesla tuning tips - Adam Aleem
I overheard some guy saying “The best way to make a Model S go faster is with a twin-turbo setup.”
16. Have I been ripped off? - Leah Colk
A friend thought the mechanics in her garage were ripping her off; she needed two new tyres and it cost her £280. I explained that it’s a perfectly reasonable price depending on which tyres she got. When I asked her this she replied “black ones.”
17. A conversation worth a screen shot - Illuminati
I asked my friend what the RB26DETT is.
18. This thing's four-wheel drive, right? Alex Savva
Talking about four-wheel drive with my friend, and he says “This is four wheel drive, isn’t it?” He happens to drive a diesel Ford Focus MK2. His reasoning for this thinking was that “all four wheels turn when the car moves”.
A few months down the line, I brought it up again, and he changes his reason. NOW he thinks that four wheel drive means “all four wheels turned, as in they all steer the car.”
19. A car knowledge and history fail combined - Shelby Birdwell
I once had a guy in my class make fun of me for my BMW E30. He said that it was a “Chinese piece of junk.” Then I showed him where it said “made in West Germany” and he said “yeah, it’s Chinese, West Germany doesn’t exist!”
20. The worst thing to say to a petrolhead - stealthed
“It’s just a car…”
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