The Four-Cylinder Jaguar F-Type Will Sell By The Truckload, But It's A Fraud

Earlier this week Jaguar revealed the details of a new four-cylinder F-Type, shortly after which the other Matt referred to those people who disapprove of it as “moody purists“. Well, I guess he means me, because on principle alone, I can’t engage with it.

I’ve said some very positive things about the F-Type before. I’ve called the coupe one of the best-looking cars ever made, I’ve heaped adulation on the characterful V6 (which we’re running as a long-termer right now) and hilarious V8, and I’ve praised the high-quality interior. It’s fair to say I’d prefer it to be nine-tenths of its current size, but, overall, I’m a fan. Which is why I’m so damn cross about the four-pot.

What happened when Audi put a diesel in the TT? What happened when Mercedes put a diesel in the SLK? When any manufacturer ever built a model that looked like the one you really wanted but was less powerful, less exciting and much less good? People bought them, that’s what happened. They bought the cheaper, less interesting, less capable ones in their tens of thousands. Great from a business standpoint, but ideologically infuriating.

The really annoying thing is that with some of the models you simply don’t know whether it’s the good one or the pretender until you’re up close. Some can even be de-badged to hide their identity almost completely. It’s like their owners are ashamed of them. And herein lies the fundamental problem with cars that look like the full banana, but aren’t: they’re frauds. They’re riding on the coat tails of their betters, pretending to be all that when in fact their key component – their engine – can’t hope to live up to the car’s image.

If you buy a sports car, it should have a sports car engine. If you want an economical car, don’t buy a sports car. If you shove a diesel engine into a sports car, as per the Audi TT, it’s no longer a sports car. If you install a four-cylinder turbo into a car that was built for a thunderous V8, you might be able to tap handling advantages thanks to reduced weight (52kg in the F-Type’s case), but where’s the theatre? The drama? The sports car joie de vivre? Only time – and a good, long drive – will tell, but the current Ford Mustang makes a good reference point. In the EcoBoost vs V8 argument, things don’t look good for the former.

The four-pot F-Type has been compared to the likes of the Cayman and Boxster 718, since the Porsches have gone four-cylinder as well, but that’s nonsense. The first F-Type was deliberately placed between the Boxster/Cayman and the 911 on price to avoid too much direct competition with either. The four-cylinder F-Type coupe is still about £8000 more expensive than the 296bhp Cayman, and a fraction cheaper than a 345bhp Cayman S. Given how much sharper and more agile the Cayman is, the F-Type has to offer something the Porsche doesn’t. But, on paper at least, the new one falls short.

It’s only 38bhp short of the basic V6, and I can’t imagine Jaguar will sell too many of those now that there’s a cheaper option. The new four is a whisker faster to 62mph, after all, and more people will be swayed by price than by V6 character. Jaguar claims that the intake and exhaust will be tuned to deliver the goods in terms of noise and has released this clip, but although we need to hear it properly before making a final judgement, the first impressions are not good. I fear that the four-cylinder F-Type has got a prestigious name, but not the goods to back it up. It’s like a kid who pursues an unfulfilling football career at Barnet just because his dad played for Manchester United.

After deliveries start for the new entry-level car, I’ll be willing to bet that at least three-quarters of all new F-Types in the UK will only have four cylinders. One day soon you’ll be standing on a kerb watching one approach, ready to enjoy the V-burble as it passes, only to be greeted with… something less good. How can a four-cylinder F-Type engine be anything other than a relative disappointment? It could taint the model; slowly chip away at its prestige over time until all that’s left is an ordinary engine in a sporty body. The F-Type could become just another car sold on style, not charisma.

Clearly that doesn’t bother all the people who buy ST Line Fords, M Sport BMWs and S line Audis, and Jaguar will no doubt make a killing on the downsized, turbocharged car, but I can’t help but feel that the F-Type is better than this.