The Mercedes-Maybach Pullman Contains More Cow Than Texas

Diplomats and royal families, your attention please: Mercedes has revealed a new Pullman ultra-long-wheelbase limousine.

Few details have been announced, but here’s what we know. At around €500,000 before options, customisations and/or bulletproofing, the 6.5-metre leviathan has today gone on sale. Up front is a pinstripe suit-inspired grille and a 621bhp twin-turbo V12 that’s smoother than George Clooney’s voice coated in melted Easter eggs, while in the middle are more luxurious cow peelings than you’d find in an entire gentleman’s club.

Those modest-looking wheels are actually 20 inches across. You don’t have to order it in full funereal spec, like the one in the picture; you can order a number of two-tone designs or create your own (within reason). Magma Grey, Mahogany Brown and a two-tone Silk Beige and Deep Blue Sea are new additions to the interior colours options list. Whatever the colour, you’re guaranteed more bovine outers than Harrods’ handbag section.

Split into two compartments by an electrically-operated (and presumably soundproof) partition screen, each end of the car can play its own audio. Up to four passengers can sit in the first-class cabin, depending on configuration, and can face each other across quilted leather arm rests and cupholders filled with expensive quaffable liquids.

The two main forward-facing rear seats are pretty much everything you could wish for a seat to be. Yes, you can sit on them. They’ll lift your tired feet. They’ll massage whatever part of your back you choose, heat or cool their backs and bases separately and give you a generally superior perch from which to involve yourself in the remote-controlled media interface.

That now includes a front-facing camera so that you can watch the road and make sure your driver isn’t deviating from his directed route. Because kidnapping movies. While your driver won’t use the V12’s performance unless it becomes necessary to avoid some scar-faced Hollywood cliché with an AK-47, 62mph comes up in a leisurely-sounding 6.5 seconds, giving us an inkling of just how much the Pullman weighs.

If you’d like your Mercedes-Maybach to have a little less length and roof, try the S650 Cabriolet…