Muslim Petrolheads In Ramadan: Expectations Vs. Reality

1. Expectation: Breaking fast at Iftar (the first meal after sunset)

Reality: Breaking traction at Iftar

2. Expectation: Prepare to hit up the mosque for late night Taraweeh prayers

Reality: Prepare to go on a traffic-free, late night hoon

3. Expectation: Try to educate yourself more about Islam and the virtues of Ramadan

Reality: Educate yourself about the best M3 mods you can’t buy on your piddly budget

4. Expectation: Visit a sick relative or elderly neighbour

Reality: Visit your local scrap yard for free parts

5. Expectation: Think of the less fortunate who are suffering in other poorer countries

Reality: Think of friends who are suffering with front-wheel drive hatchbacks

6. Expectation: Donate extra money to charity

Reality: Donate extra money to Chris Harris’ Patreon

7. Expectation: Try and do all of your Salat prayers on time with correct recitation

Reality: “Thank you for providing us with the direct-port nitrous injection, four-core intercoolers, an’ ball-bearing turbos, and titanium valve springs.”

8. Expectation: Refrain from sexual intercourse during the fasting day

Reality: Try to prevent arousal when browsing cars on AutoTrader

9. Expectation: Spend the weekend becoming more spiritual and conserving energy

Reality: Wake up on Saturday and decide to do a full car detail