5 Idiotic Mistakes People Make When Trying To Sell A Car Online

Selling a car isn't rocket science, all it takes is a little common sense. Unfortunately the thing about common sense is that it isn't all that common
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Okay CTzens, I have something to get off my chest. And I’m not going to be kind about this either, because it goes way beyond the normal pet peeve for me. I say this because, if any of you are guilty of the things I’m about to describe, you should unplug from the internet and proceed to bury your face in a big yellow book called Selling For Dummies.

You see, the internet might be the single greatest invention since the wheel, but it’s empowered us to do all kinds of things we know nothing about. There’s nobility in the effort, but just like the wheel proved some people should stick to walking, the internet has proven some people should stick to letting other people sell their cars.

Every single day I see at least a dozen pathetic, facepalm-worthy attempts to sell cars. These terrible advert fails officially outnumber the “I told him it was me or the car” memes by like 188 to one. So if you’re guilty of any of the following car selling sins, go buy the book. Read the book. Then come back here and re-read this article. Not only will you have earned the respect of your fellow car brethren, you’ll also earn significantly more money on your sale.

Here are five idiotic mistakes you’ll see all too often in the classifieds…

1. Taking terrible pictures

5 Idiotic Mistakes People Make When Trying To Sell A Car Online

I can’t believe I even need to mention this, yet I see it time and again. If you’re trying to sell a car online, show buyers what it freaking looks like. If you don’t know what makes a good picture, call that one friend who’s always taking photos of everything and let him or her help out. You don’t need hundreds of shots showing every possible angle, but get a couple from each side, front and back, the interior, and the engine.

If you don’t have any friends, here’s a quick photo-taking lesson. Always take pictures with the light behind you. Yes, that could mean you have to move the car to get all angles with light behind you. For interior pictures, it might help to have some extra light inside to actually show some detail instead of glare and shadows. Grab the hand-held shop light you use to change the oil - that’s all you need. Make sure the whole car is actually in the picture; stand close enough to show some detail but don’t stand a block away so the car looks like a tiny spec. Take your time to get these pictures right, because they are the first impression potential buyers will have of your car.

2. Taking pictures at night

5 Idiotic Mistakes People Make When Trying To Sell A Car Online

Yeah, I could’ve easily mentioned this above, but this dumbassery is so epic that it deserves its own special talking point. Don’t. Take. Pictures. At. Night. Remember what I just said about keeping the light behind you? There is no light at night; that’s what makes it night. Street lights won’t illuminate your car properly, and your flash bulb doesn’t count either. Both will create bright spots on the car while other parts are still completely in shadow.

Whenever I see a car advertised with photos taken at night I think one of three things. Firstly, the seller is so desperate to get rid of the car they couldn’t wait a few hours to take proper pictures in daylight. Secondly, I believe the seller is trying to hide damage or a terrible paint job in the hopes of getting people to see it in person. Finally, I think the seller is too lazy to invest even the simplest effort in presenting their car, which again, makes me wonder what else the seller is too lazy to do. In the end it doesn’t matter, because they’re all instant deal breakers.

3. Not mentioning maintenance

5 Idiotic Mistakes People Make When Trying To Sell A Car Online

Nobody wants to buy a crap car, so if you’ve done some maintenance or have maintenance records, say so. You don’t necessarily need to list every single detail, but for crying out loud, maintenance is the first things buyers want to know about. If you can say right off the bat that the car has been well maintained and back it up with even just a few specifics, you are going to get way more attention than just listing all the mods and telling people how fast it is. I’ll never understand how a seller can spend a paragraph talking about ride and handling, yet somehow think the new timing belt or water pump aren’t worth mentioning.

More importantly, you’re going to get attention from serious buyers when you mention maintenance items, and those are the people you want calling or emailing about the car. There’s certainly nothing wrong with listing modifications, but list maintenance items first. That way, when buyers see maintenance before mods, it gives the impression (and rightfully so) that maintenance is more important. Serious buyers like that, and it will absolutely help sell the car.

4. Claiming something's an 'easy fix'

5 Idiotic Mistakes People Make When Trying To Sell A Car Online

Every time someone mentions “easy fix” in an ad I get the urge to find their house and launch tomatoes at the car in question with a water balloon slingshot. Cleaning up high-speed tomato debris is an easy fix; claiming that low compression in the number four cylinder is an easy fix is insulting. Or my favourite: ‘yeah the radiator has a leak but it’s not a problem. Just top off the coolant every week and it’s fine’.

Here’s my beef with the easy fix: nine times out of 10 the seller tried to mend this ‘easy fix’ and discovered it wasn’t so easy. Maybe the problem was more in-depth, or perhaps time and the elements made what should’ve been an easy fix quite difficult. As for the 10th time - why not just fix the easy fix? Not doing so says you’re lazy and not that interested in keeping the car maintained.

5. "I know it's 99 per cent aftermarket, but it's never been abused..."

5 Idiotic Mistakes People Make When Trying To Sell A Car Online

I’m speaking here of the complete and total lie that someone would invest an absurd amount of money to make a car go fast, then never actually go fast with it. If you feel the need to tell the world how you were a perfect angel with this car, then you were probably just the opposite. Spare us all the condescending double-talk - if you built a kick-ass race car then never raced it, turn in your driver’s license and ride the bus. You don’t deserve to drive.

Now, I know there can be some legitimate people out there who have built some seriously fast rides, maybe went for a joyride or two and decided for whatever reason that you didn’t want it. That’s fine, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t at least exercised. Just say it like it is. That’s how real enthusiasts talk, and as a buyer, I’m very happy to buy from another enthusiast. I won’t, however, give the time of day to a self-righteous idiot who claims to have babied a highly modified machine that he’ll only sell to ‘serious shoppers’ who won’t waste his time. Guess what pal? If I’m not worth your time, then your car isn’t worth my cash.

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Comments

Anonymous

This is how I sold my 300ZX, good pictures in daylight to show the paint, interior pictures and a picture of the engine bay (To me I feel the engine bay is important to see when buying a car like this.) On top of that I had every single receipt of mods and maintenance done and wrote down the mileage, date and what was done in a journal every time something was done. Then on top of that I let people that I did race the car. I was able to go race, and drive back just fine and go to school/work the next day. If that scared you as a buyer than why are you buying a car that was meant to be driven?

02/01/2016 - 16:33 |
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Mixxer

Very good when using translator, no need to make thinking english. Buyer interesting guaranteed!

02/01/2016 - 18:33 |
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Comfused Miata

Not telling about the condition of suspension, chassic or engine

02/01/2016 - 18:48 |
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Nick Dean

When u c all the various models on one tittle

02/02/2016 - 10:30 |
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Nezbit

or when you find that add that has the title / description
‘not skyline silvia sr20 rb26det not Toyota celica supra saxo’

02/02/2016 - 11:25 |
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Anonymous

Good Images aren’t always helping finding a good car. I looked at my CUPRA and a BMW 120i at the same day. The Cupra was as good as Descriped and the Images showed. But the BMW was a Disaster You couldn’t see anything wrong with it on the Images but it had problems everywhere 5 Year Old car nearly 0 Paint at the Rear bumper under the exhaust left Paint chips wich where already rusting everywhere (Boonet, Drivers Door, Passangers Door, etc). The Trader Said yeah its a used car you have to deal with it nope i’m not going down in price for that. I Opened the the Bonnet and looked for the last Oil Change Milage it was 64K KM the car was adversed at 98K with a new Timing Chain at arrount 90K KM (you also have to change the Oil with it). The Service Book looked like someone Printed it out 5 minutes ago all Stamps looked exactly the same and The book said the last Oil change was at KM 62K I just gave the Key back to the Trader and drove Home. The next Day I bought my Cupra. The only flaw with it was a small scrape at the front right Rim, A few chips at the Headlights and 1 Oilchange wich was 2K Km late about 4 Years ago.
The Images on the BMW where much better and the Car looked much more promising inside the description. So don’t think only because it looks good on the Pictures that it’s always that good in Real Life. I just looked it up and its still Online.http://ww3.autoscout24.de/classified/282343361

02/02/2016 - 15:10 |
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Anonymous

“lady driven”… SKIP!

02/03/2016 - 00:04 |
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Anonymous

Another great article, Chris! Keep it up :)

02/03/2016 - 14:02 |
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Anonymous

My favorite is not taking pictures and then making a point about lowering the price.

04/14/2016 - 17:13 |
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Anonymous

This needs a diesel truck section.

  1. “Trucks in perfect condition. Only the gauges don’t work and it smokes when you start it. “
    2.” I only put aftermarket gauges in it to monitor the engine. I didn’t beat on it.”
  2. “ I only put 300hp injectors on it. I never bought a turbo.”

(Why is this site making up numbers? It shows 1-3 until I post…)

11/19/2016 - 05:47 |
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