Ricers: An Honest Take

Introduction

To depart from just making my normal series of lists, and relevant pieces, with this hopefully new series, I will attempt to give honest opinions and assessments of topics related to car’s and the car world. The topic of this article is Ricers and ricer culture (yes, it exists).

What is a Ricer?

I think most of us have a rough idea of what a ricer is, but it is necessary to make sure we are on the same page. Urban Dictionary says a ricer is,” A person who makes unnecessary modifications to their most often import car (hence the term “rice”) to make it (mostly make it look) faster.”. This is a pretty good definition but the full ricer disease is more complicated, and really there is a spectrum for ricers. In short, there are many ricers, but not many that cross the line into pure insanity. Also, a car’s rice levels rely on its appearance and performance, while the ricerness of the owner depends on how much they lie, are overconfident, and over-hype their car. Additionally, stupidity generally plays a huge role in how big of a ricer you are; I’ve never heard of a ricer who was, for example, a doctor, accountant,or lawyer. Also generally, ricers can be irritating d-bags ( tw@ts for you Brits). The main evidence is how they look down on normal cars even though their car has been rendered un-sellable due to the amount of cr@p they bolted onto it.

How were Ricers and the Ricer Culture Created

This topic is actually quite interesting and I admit we can never quite pinpoint the beginning of this trend. One factor that created the most ricers was the Fast and the Furious, which came out in 2001, and took over from the sort of flashy culture that was bred in the 90’s. In fact, I’m not really sure ricers existed at all pre-1980s in America and Europe, and it was just emerging in the 90s. The Fast and the Furious fed off of an already big ricer culture and made it very popular. It is important to note, that there were some very real car people and nice cars that inspired the Fast and the Furious that resulted from the movie’s popularity, but the movie definitely generated more ricers than car people, and the car people who loved the movie already loved cars. One other thing to take into account is that the characters in the movie look cool, which was the impetus behind the ricer movement, not genuine car love. The last piece of the puzzle is the corporations, who stoked the flames. Autozone, Advanced Auto-parts, and most off all Walmart are just a few stores where you can buy cheap “aesthetic parts” such as: fake hood scoops, fake body kits, fake wings, fake wheel covers, fake seat covers, crappy shift knobs, fake vents, brake caliper covers, and, most of all, stickers. There are many more products, and even some that are close to legitimacy, like cold airflow systems, and exhausts, but generally these products are all for show and provide no “go”. It’s actually quite sad what corporations have done to these unfortunate ricers, who could have saved their money and been patient to buy a better car or real parts. Instead, these ricers are duped by these downright predatory companies who produce this tasteless and useless junk!

Examining Ricers and their Cars, and the "Ricer Spectrum"

As basic logic would suggest, being a ricer or having a ricer car is not an all off or all on thing. The start of being a ricer, is quite innocent. Keep in mind this is not a perfect model, as no model is.

Level 1: Innocense

You just buy a few stickers, or you get some neat nick-nacks/accessories for your normal car. This isn’t such a bad thing, and if you bought good stickers it even helps to show your love for cars in a healthy way. These are often people that don’t even know what being a ricer even is. Nonfunctional parts that are still of good quality fit under this level too (pod air flow filters, etc).

Alternate Level 1: Homemade DYS

I put this here as it doesn’t fit with the other categories because it is a quite different form of the ricer insanity. Most of these ricers are less threatening and exhibit less d-baggery, and are generally more juvenile. This child-like nature of these ricers comes from the fact that they are living a more traditional fantasy, and have less credibility of store bought crap with false advertising. Building materials include cardboard boxes, wood, loose metal, even paper. Some people even use this style to parody ricers, as they would be called ricers by actual ricers, which is ironic.

Level 2: With an extra side of RICE

This group makes up the majority of people who we label “ricers”. These people have descended from level one, into the depths of full rice modifications. Their cars, are quite ricy, with hood scoops, wheel covers or cheap rims, and cheap stickers or a tacky paint job. These people may believe to some extent their cars are legitimate sports cars, but they have not hit the final stage of ricer insanity yet. Their cars can only be a bit more ricy, but the depth of their delusion still has the potential to grow.

Level 3: I'm Starting to Feel like a RICE-GOD

Oh boy, this is rock bottom. These cars have either hit full rice or are close to it. They may be worth more than cars in Level 1, or 2, but the owner has definitely invested either lots of money or time in a car that tries to look good and go fast but does neither. The owner, is actually the more interesting specimen . You either have to be either really stupid, delusional, or a straight up lier to fit in this category. Claims include: fake quarter mile times, fake hp figure, aesthetic mods adding hp or downforce they don’t actually add, claims that the best parts come from (blank) store, beating far superior cars, and blaming mechanical issues for losing races. The lies are so transparent, anyone who has even 1 skeptical cell in their body would smell the lies.

?Level 4?: Ricer cars that cost actual Money

This is almost where ricerism comes full circle. These cars have little in the way of performance, but result from people who have the same ricer goals, but actually have gained enough money to fund their enterprise properly. These cars have: tacky but expensive body kits, expensive sound systems, neon underglow, nice interior, expensive but in bad taste paint jobs, and other expensive useless parts. It’s easier to have respect for the owners of these cars, as more labour and money went into their rides, even if its “not my thing”.

Final Opinions

Some people rage against ricers, but often others say if you so much as make one criticism of a ricer you are a “hater”. Hopefully, in fully explaining the ricer condition, I showed you all why I just dislike these people and their cars. Ricerism breeds ignorance, stupidity, d-baggery, and creates “posers”. Many ricers, especially the ones who try to race people or claim they have beaten real sports cars, are just the worst. Also, to dismiss the “oh, but they’re just poor” argument, I’m not rich, but maybe I’m just a car guy with taste who might choose to buy a few nice stickers to show my support for car culture community, and soon do cheap mods like mudflaps. Showing your love cars with a tight budget does not mean you have to be a ricer and showing your pride is quite appropriate if done tastefully. Not telling you to hate its just that too many ricers are not car lovers; they just want to show off and to feel fast……..and that just makes me furious. And on that bombshell, Goodnight! Oh, well it might not be night, whatever, like comment, follow, and have a nice day :) #blogpost